As a lifelong fat person, I have always hated CLOTHES. Hated looking at it, buying it, wearing it, paying for it just.. Hated it
I reckon that there is alot of overweight people out there like me who knows the terrible feeling of manning yourself up to go into a store, well aware that you will have to get the biggest sizes on the shelves, and that out of all the clothes in the store, only some of it will look decent on you and if you're lucky to find something that looks fantastic you'll have to pay whatever it costs because you've been lucky enough to find some!
I don't know if this story seems familiar to some of you, but that is basically how I feel about clothes, and how I have always felt. But today I wanted to share something lovely with you. As some might know, I went raw till 4 vegan on the 22nd of April 2014, and say whatever you want about it, I have yielded amazing result so far that thrills me on a daily basis. I could make a whole long list about all the amazing things that have happened, and I will - but today I just wanted to share this.
About a month ago, I bought this pair of pants. Two sizes down from what I've had to have my ONE pair of (very ill-fitting and never worn) jeans. On these pants I could only close the top button, closing the second or trying to zip the zipper was impossible. But I really liked the pants, and they were at a very decent prize. I called my mom to the fitting-room and asked her whether to buy them or not. I feel like we always get taught by the magazines and the media not to buy clothes that we'll have to lose a little weight to fit into, or we should throw out old clothes that doesn't fit anymore in order not to discourage ourselves. Despite this, I bought the pants. I didn't try them on again, and I said to myself "I'll try on these pants again when I'm at 97 kg".
Well, today I was 96,6 kg, so I tried them on, so worried that they wouldn't fit, worried that I had fulfilled a prophecy for disappointment and failure, but as you can see - they fit! And I am just ecstatic!
I thought I'd add in a picture of my t-shirt here. I bought it a while ago in the hopes that I could wear it and show some university pride, but the fact of the matter is that even though it was a huge man-size, I looked terrible on me, and look now. It is super baggy, very oversize and I wear it all the time now around the house, to remind myself how far I've come. (I don't wear it out all that often because it is really ill-fitting due to oversize!)
I know that I have soooo much more weight to lose, but when you've been completely down in the depths and never ever thought you could get any better, not even the slightest. When you'd leaned back and given up, accepted obesity, looking and feeling terrible, accepting that diabetes was an inevitability in your life, seeing this now and feeling it can almost make me cry!
- Elk
